The Hand comes down

Greetings, Gentles! I am the Stout Master, and we now return to our chronicle of the Antagonistic Buddha's early years, when he was still known by his given name, J_____.

In our last article, Scratch and Kate's relationship had tipped the Drunken Master over the edge, and J_____ was preoccupied with rehearsals for his musical theater debut. The Drunken Master had suffered a compete breakdown in public, but J_____ came to his aid.

J____ nursed his mentor back to health, although it took a good week and plenty of afternoon martinis to accomplish the task. However, the Drunken Master's emotional state was still very precarious. He was convinced that Kate loved him, and he merely had to prove himself worthy. J_____ and Tom Collins both tried to free the Drunken Master of this delusion, but he would not budge from his conviction.

To make matters worse, Kate insisted on visiting the convalescing Drunken Master. J_____ and Tom Collins both pleaded with her to stay away, but she refused.

In a show of solidarity to the outside, the Drunken Disciples of God all attended the Friday night opening of Little Shop of Horrors. They sat together in the front row, and Scratch was the first to leap to his feet for the standing ovation at J_____'s curtain call. It was a very public display of unity.

On Saturday night, as J_____ appeared again on stage, the other four Drunken Disciples of God sat down for their weekly meeting. Buzz had been building all day around the rumor that Scratch would make an important proposal, so the room was packed with onlookers.

After agreeing that four constituted a quorum, the floor was opened for new business. Scratch rose and began his proposal. In his view, the "Drunken Disciples of God," while a memorable and evocative name, did not carry the gravitas necessary for the group to become a true player in the community and continue after the current members left. In place of this name, Scratch proposed, "The Hand."

"The hand has five fingers," Scratch gestured at the five seats around the table, "Each of which can exist independently of others. However, when the five fingers of the hand come together for a single unified purpose..." At this, Scratch clenched his uplifted hand into a fist. "The hand becomes an object of unwavering power."

A murmur went through the gathered crowd. Every one of them knew the Drunken Disciples of God was the name suggested by the Drunken Master himself. The proposal was not merely a change in name, it was a bid for leadership and control of the group. And through all this, the Drunken Master seemed more interested in constructing a pyramid from the shot glasses he was emptying at an alarming rate.

Tom Collins replied with a protest and desperately tried to rouse the Drunken Master's interest. Kate pressed the matter by calling for a vote. Tom Collins urged the group wait until J_____ was available to take part in the vote. Kate reminded him that the group had a quorum.

Without waiting for assent, Scratch voted in favor of the name change. Tom Collins countered with a loud, "No." Kate let the echo fade, then voted in favor.

All eyes turned to the Drunken Master. He, however, was looking at Kate. Tears glistened in his eyes while he watched her.

And then he voted in favor of changing the name.